Openness for Trauma Survivors

"In a world that lives like a fist
trust is no more than waking
with your hands open."
by Mark Nepo, The Book of Awakening

This quote from Mark Nepo's book challenges us to open up to the present moment, to be open to possibilities. "Waking with your hands open" makes sense in the context of an adult who grew up with secure attachment figures, enough resources to focus on being his or her best self, and enough ego strength to fend off the typical hardships that everyone encounters in life.  However, finding a balance between opening up to the world and protecting yourself can feel scary to people with a history of trauma.

​There are good reasons why we have instincts that tell us to fight, flee, or freeze.  Honoring those instincts is a good place to start. They got you through the trauma.  But after the trauma is over, your body might not realize it's over, despite what your logic tells you.  This is called post-traumatic stress disorder. 

The first steps to treating trauma, no matter what treatment model your therapist/counselor is using, is to help you find strategies to communicate to your body (your emotional core, your heart, your feeling parts, your viscera) that you are safe enough in the here and now.  Granted, safety is a relative term, and none of us are 100% safe at all times.  But if the threat is really over for you, and you are currently relatively safe in your life, maybe it's time to consider living as if that is true.  Openness doesn't have to feel scary forever.